Its a Small World After All { tips on disney with kids }

I grew up very close to Disney World. Visits punctuated my childhood like sledding or apple picking may have in other regions. When I was a kid, it was magical. When I was a preteen, my visits were a chance to be free from chaperones and maybe even to get into a little mischief with my friends. In college, I was completely disdainful. I ruthlessly picked apart the themes of each ride. The sexism and overly sanitized views of history destroyed any fun I might have had during that very cynical time. I even considered writing my thesis on the Carousel of Progress. As a young parent, I was Disney-shy and had big questions about the consumeristic messages, princess culture and general bombardment of the senses.

Now, as a somewhat seasoned parent, we simply go to Disney World and have a fun time. My kids like it alright, but are not huge fans. What I have done recently to occupy myself while riding the monorail or more likely, waiting in line, is to watch the other visitors trying desperately to have a good time. The money a family must spend for a week at Disney is outrageous. The expectations for intense memory making and magic slam right against the sliding glass door of reality. High prices, long lines, hot weather, and whiny kids make this place a real challenge for many families.


So, I offer my unsolicited advice for visiting The Magic Kingdom. There are entire books of strategies   for doing Disney with kids. My simple suggestions are for the situations I have witnessed countless times each visit.


1. Be well rested and arrive early. That is pretty good advice for most of life, actually. Fastpass tickets for the most popular rides can go quickly, depending on the season, so an early arrival ensures you can get tickets to the rides on your family's must do list. Also, the weather is a bit cooler.  And if you are going to Animal Kingdom, the animals will be more lively. The parks seem to get really crowded a few hours after they open; an early arrival is your best bet for some good times before the meltdowns begin.


2. Bring your own food. Disney lets you bring in your own food! This one is huge for us. The food at Disney is over priced and highly processed. There are a few better restaurants but many require reservations and the prices are exorbitant. By bringing your own food and snacks, you can save a ton of money (and then maybe splurge on a Mickey Mouse ice cream bar).  It is really hard to fuel kids on hot dogs and pop and then expect them to walk in 95 degree humidity and not be cranky! A bag of sandwiches, hummus, fruit, nuts, and other healthy snacks will make everyone happier.


3. Dress appropriately. As fun as it seems, dressing your 4 year old in a synthetic, scratchy dress, with plastic high heels and long nylon hair extensions is not going to play out very well. I get it - kids want to dress up, but maybe something more comfortable, or at least a change of clothes would be more manageable. Oddly, this goes for adults too. It is amazing how many women come to Disney in high heels and miniskirts. Getting into a ride while wearing a miniskirt is pretty revealing for the rest of the queue. Also, it rains in Florida alot. It makes sense to stop at the dollar store and pick up some cheap ponchos in case you get caught in a downpour. Of course, if you forget, Disney will be more than happy to sell you one for ten times the price.



4. Do not forget the less popular rides. When we need a break from the cacophony and visual overload, we head to the People Mover, which just rides you around Tommorrowland. You can stay on it as long as you like and there are a few quick turns, so younger kids might even think it is a real ride. Other favorites are Carousel of Progress, The Hall of Presidents (30 minutes in a dark air conditioned theatre),  the Swiss Family Tree House and Tom Sawyer's Island.


5. Do not try to do it all. There is no way you can do all the rides, or really even most of them. I can not tell you how many times I have seen parents take a screaming child on a ride simply because they want to do as much as possible. Everyone is red faced and snappy - not the kind of memories you were trying to make. Remember, you are there to have fun, and part of that might be just sitting and watching people for a while, or riding the train around the park three times in a row.


Here are a few more tips:
Consider a bringing a stroller, even for older kids - it gives them a safe place to rest and decompress, you can stash all your stuff on it, and even use it as a battering ram if you need to (was that out loud)?
Get a haircut on Main Street. The barbershop is reasonable and pretty fun. You can even get a sprinkling of glitter in your hair for free (at least last time I was there).
Bring one of these water bottle spray fans. You can pick them up at Target or WalMart for about $5. They sell them in the park for $20. And as goofy as they seem, you will want one when you are dripping hot. 
If you are not into the parade scene - it is a great time to do rides. The lines are much more manageable. 
Consider staying in a resort. That sounds luxurious and against my earlier budget-y tips, but it might be worth it. If you stay at a resort, you can enter the park an hour before it is open to the public. Also, you can leave during the heat of the day to swim or relax in your air conditioned room and then return in the evening. And the resorts host other fun activities, like story times and entertainment. I recommend the Wilderness Lodge, which has a boat that takes you directly to The Magic Kingdom. 

I would love to hear your theme park tips! Please leave a comment with your best idea!

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